F is for Fear of Rejection
by
Nancy Pennick
I
admit I am sensitive. I get my feelings hurt very easily. So why put myself
through the torture of rejection?
The
fear of rejection was the hardest thing to overcome after I wrote my first
book. When you write, you’re alone in your own little world, happily writing
your story. The next step was the scary part—getting it out there. From what I
read, you needed an agent to get published and be successful.
Agents
are very good at rejection. They have all different ways of saying your book is
not for them. They also suggest that someone else may like it even if it’s not
right for them. My
first rejection letter came in the mail. I read it over and over, letting it
sink in. It took a few days to get over but I realized if I was going to get published,
I had to take the rejection.
I
needed to develop my own personal plan to get over this fear. I had to become
my own life coach. I knew I needed pep talks and I was the only one who could
do it. I began a list in my head of what had to be done.
The
first thing I had to do was not care so much. This wasn’t personal. It’s a
business. Don’t take it to heart.
I
became my own cheerleader. I assured myself it was okay and I’d live to see
another day.
I
had to accept the rejection. Most came by e-mail and I saved them all. When one
came along, I added it to a folder marked “Queries”. Read them and move
on. There’s
a great song out now from the Disney movie, . Its title, Let it
Go, says it all. Don’t dwell on the rejection.
Frozen
Imagine
my surprise when I finally got an offer to publish my book! I had to read it
over carefully because I was so used to skimming the contents for the
rejection. If I had given into my fear, I wouldn’t be here now, telling you
about my third book in my series, Stealing Time.
I
recently read a story about a young girl who went to her mother and
asked, Why bother trying anymore?” The mother went to the kitchen and
filled three pots with water. She placed an apple in one, an egg in another and
finally tea into the last, bringing them to a boil. The girl didn’t understand
why her mom did that. Her mother said it taught something about facing
challenging times. The daughter shook her head, confused. The mother explained.
The apple went into the water hard and came out soft and spongy. The egg was
hard and firm. However, the tea transformed the water into something good,
healing and beneficial.
The
mother then asked the daughter what she would do when she was faced with the
trials of life. Would she be similar to the apple and fall apart? Or grow hard
like the egg? Or perhaps, like the tea, turn your trials into triumph,
something of value.
The
story can be applied to all our obstacles in life. Which would you choose? I’ve
always been a tea lover myself.
****
Be sure to check out Nancy's newest release in her YA time travel romance series!
Title: Stealing Time
Series: Waiting For Dusk #3
Author: Nancy Pennick
Genre: Young Adult
Publisher: fire & Ice
Formats Available In: Kindle, Nook and Print
Release Date: 24th February 2014
Drew from the past…
Kate from the present…
Two worlds collided.
As senior year comes to a close, a promise of new beginnings is on the horizon. Kate longs to head to Arizona and college until her former friend, Tyson, does the unimaginable forcing her to stay in Ohio. Her family has to pull together to keep their secrets safe. Anna wishes to return to the canyon in 1927 once more and Kate’s determined to make that a reality. Summer’s filled with wonderful memories and little warning of things to come. Kate’s world grows darker and she must be the one to conquer the demons and save the world that is most precious to her.
This was an in spin story. As a writer still working on my first novel in a series of three, I have yet to cross this bridge. When I do, I will keep your story in mind as a source of inspiration.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Patricia. Keep writing!
ReplyDeleteYes, it is a scary time having to write the dreaded query letter. Writers have to grow a thick skin to take the good with the bad. Knowing that Stephen King also gathered rejection letters helps somewhat too.
ReplyDeleteGlad you hung in there. I'm a tea drinker myself..
Leona, Thank you, fellow tea drinker, your kind words. Thanks also to Mysti for hosting me today and coming up with this great idea.
ReplyDeleteGood thoughts Nancy. There is always someone who doesn't like what we think is wonderful. I guess it's just the way of the world. Congrats on Stealing Time and never, never give up!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Susan, for your support. Everyone thinks different...what we like may not be to their taste. If it isn't, at least, be kind about it.
ReplyDeleteRejection is hard, but it's all part of the process. I'm actually glad my first couple of books got rejections because they really weren't ready for anyone to look at.
ReplyDeleteGreat way of looking at it, Kate. When I look at some of my early stuff, I know it wasn't ready either.
ReplyDeleteThat was a great article about determination. So happy for you.
ReplyDeleteI fear success more than rejection. I need to see an analyst!
ReplyDeleteAll the best with your third book.
Wow, good analogy! I had never heard that one before :) Ah, rejection....my old enemy. I'm very glad you pushed through to publish your books - I am a better person for reading them...and its good to have a "stalkee" friend <3
ReplyDeleteRejection is never easy..but I try to look at it in this way..when you go shopping in a store, do you always buy everything you see? Do you ever stop to think of the time the manufacturer took to create the items you reject? How personally should they take it that you didn't buy their product today? When we write, we put our heart and soul into that poem, story, novel, etc. But when it comes down to it, we are offering the public a product. The fact that it means everything to you, does not iimpress the consumer. It is just another story to them, and there are millions of them out there available for purchase. Not an easy concept to accept as an author. But it is a reminder to not take the rejections personally. Just package it up and send it somewhere else. Keep up the good work. You have some excellent points in your article. You have done well to complete your writings..Many of us still have those novels in our minds, or maybe even on paper, but have never had the gumption to actually submit them anywhere. Good luck to you.
ReplyDeleteThanks, D.G. Driver and Fanny Barnes Thornton! And Tara, my friend, thanks for having my back. NurseArtist, you make several good points. There are millions of books and choices to make. It's not personal.
ReplyDeleteGood outlook, Nancy. We can't let life end with one rejection. Persistence pays off when we keep trying. I think rejection hurts the most when our expectations have been set too high.
ReplyDeleteMysti--Now following your blog. Good to be here.
Lee
Wrote By Rote
An A to Z Co-host blog
Thanks, Arlee! I agree.
DeleteThanks for stopping by and following, Arlee! And thanks for the A-Z Blog Challenge. It's a wonderful way to connect with others and learn from them.
DeleteNancy, your article should be printed out and hung on every writer's wall! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Mysti, for your kind words!
Delete