Friday, February 13, 2015

Let's Get Scientifical #13: Mom, Dad, and Lover Makes Three?


Welcome to Unwritten's February blog event! Of course, this is the month of love, so I wanted to celebrate that theme as I've done in year's past. But this year, I've decided to add a scientific spin to it. All month long, talented authors from several genres will write about some aspect of love from their books as it relates to science. It could be social, psychological, biological, or anything in between. Our blog event is sponsored by "HMC by Kate", a fabulous independent jewelry crafter. Kate's giving away one of her very beautiful necklaces that I think fits our theme perfectly. She's also offering everyone who stops in a 10% discount on any item from her Etsy store. Be sure to enter the giveaway at the end of this post and check out her lovely offerings! Without further ado, please welcome our guest author:

Happily Ever After, Happy For Now…
by S.S. Hampton, Sr.

            Happy Valentine’s Day!
            You know, the romantic song Love Changes Everything (Andrew Lloyd Webber, composer; Charles Hart and Don Black, lyrics) says it all.
            It says it all about those couples who find Happy Ever After, and even those who find Happy For Now. And what if those couples add a third person to the mix? By the way, we are talking about ordinary people here—not rich corporate CEOs, beautiful college girls, or powerful politicians and sexy secretaries. Just ordinary people who explore the world around them.
            In my novel Sharing Rachel (MuseItUp Publishing, 2014), an ordinary husband and wife, small business owners in Kansas, are left with an empty nest when their daughters go east to attend a university. Faced with an unchanging routine that threatens to stretch far into the future, Burt Markham has a surprising idea. But, will his wife Rachel accept the idea? And if she does, will that threaten or strengthen their marriage?
            It is no surprise that there are many couples (admittedly a small minority) who explore the sexual world together, even if only one of them passionately and intimately embraces that world—with the permission and support of their other half.
            Studies have shown that love physically impacts our bodies through releasing various chemicals. For example, dopamine—when released it provides pleasure through a variety of activities, including love. The chemical oxytocin is a “bonding chemical” that reinforces the feeling among a couple of belonging to a loved one. Testosterone is present in both men and women, especially when sex is involved.
            Those chemicals (along with many others) are also present if, for example, the wife with her husband’s approval and support, maintains a short-term or long-term lover outside the marriage. Or several lovers over a span of time. Of course, this does not mean that the husband and wife love each other any less. It simply means that the wife has the freedom to explore her sexuality with other men (or sometimes other women).
            It also does not mean that the woman loves her lover—though the same chemicals are present, she may be driven more by lust than love. After all, who has not had the experience of encountering someone attractive, feeling immediate lust, followed by sexual gratification? That experience can be as exhilarating as love, though lust is usually much shorter in duration.
            Admittedly, this sort of marriage, this sort of love, is not for everyone. But for those who explore and find that a 3-person relationship works for them, then it is just as much Happy Ever After or Happy For Now, as it is for a traditional couple.
            And so remember, it really is true that Love Changes Everything. (I believe that love also makes all things possible.)
            So, Happy Valentine’s Day to you and yours! Or, in some cases, Happy Valentine’s Day to you and yours, and hers!
           
****

            Stan Hampton, Sr. is a full-blood Choctaw of the Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma, a divorced
grandfather to 13 wonderful grandchildren, and a published photographer and photojournalist. He retired on 1 July 2013 from the Army National Guard with the rank of Sergeant First Class; he previously served in the active duty Army (1974-1985), the Army Individual Ready Reserve (1985-1995) (mobilized for the Persian Gulf War), and enlisted in the Nevada Army National Guard in October 2004, after which he was mobilized for Federal active duty for almost three years. Hampton is a veteran of Operations Noble Eagle (2004-2006) and Iraqi Freedom (2006-2007) with deployment to northern Kuwait and several convoy security missions into Iraq.
            His writings have appeared as stand-alone stories and in anthologies from Dark Opus Press, Edge Science Fiction & Fantasy, Melange Books, Musa Publishing, MuseItUp Publishing, Ravenous Romance, and as stand-alone stories in Horror Bound Magazine, The Harrow, and River Walk Journal, among others.
            In May 2014 he graduated from the College of Southern Nevada with an Associate of Applied Science Degree in Photography – Commercial Photography Emphasis. A future goal is to study for a degree in archaeology—hopefully to someday work in and photograph underwater archaeology (and also learning to paint).
            After 13 years of brown desert in the Southwest and overseas, he misses the Rocky Mountains, yellow aspens in the fall, running rivers, and a warm fireplace during snowy winters.
            As of April 2014, after being in a 2-year Veterans Administration program for Homeless Veterans, Hampton is officially no longer a homeless Iraq War veteran, though he is still struggling to get back on his feet.
            Hampton can be found at:

Dark Opus Press

Edge Science Fiction & Fantasy Publishing

Melange Books

Musa Publishing

MuseItUp Publishing

Ravenous Romance

Amazon.com Author Page

Amazon.com. UK Author Page

Goodreads Author Page


BONUS QUESTION! 
Stan's offering an extra prize:

What famous author in the 1920s wrote a novel about wife-sharing, and what is the title?

The prize for the first person to answer correctly, is a RED spaghetti strap top emblazoned with "Of course I'm not cheating...I let my husband watch"


ENTER TO WIN!

This beautiful handmade necklace from HMC by KATE

            
a Rafflecopter giveaway

1 comment:

  1. Hello Stan, a very entertaining article. It sounds like Rachel is a very busy girl. all the best with your books.

    ReplyDelete

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